keep looking for your Ray of Hope

“It was my 20s when I was diagnosed with severe health issues like anxiety, depression and panic attacks. This trouble-time had a deep connection with my childhood.
I share a very loving relationship with my parents. But my childhood was not a happy phase of my life. Majorly due to two sudden incidents.

When my mother went out for a job, my grandmother took care of me. As I spent a lot of my time with my grandmother, she was very close to me. At a very young age, I lost her.

One more tragedy happened to me

Few years after her death, one more tragedy happened to me. In front of my eyes, my cousin brother lost his life in the swimming pool. The guilty that I couldn’t save him hunted me for years. Not to forget those nights when I woke up in the middle of the night because of the nightmares.

Both events took place during my early teenage days. But anxiety and depression lingered on till the 20s, ruining my career and my personal relationships.

I strongly believe our childhood days has a strong impact on our adult life. Failed relationships, horrible nightmares, and depressions, sudden mood swings, I was not really in control of myself. I had no confidence in myself. I was completely broken from inside. Fear of losing my loved ones was one of the biggest fears I was trying to deal with.

I did not give up

I invested my late 20s in watching self-help videos, reading books, and consulting experts. part from medicine prescriptions, yoga tips, I felt huge pressure from society to get married. The situation was bad and overwhelming for me. I kept working on self-improvement continued. I must have fallen 100 times with a hope to rise again. I started monitoring my thoughts, practiced yoga, and traveled a lot.

Finally, I found my positive. Travelling worked as a healing therapy and made me confident about myself. Now I am in my 30s. The recovery journey was not easy. But I am very proud of my journey. I am happy to see this happy version of myself. It’s the best phase of my life. From my experiences, I have learned, whatever situation you are in, there is always a ray of hope around. Never lose hope. Always keep on trying.

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